Dumb laws of Washington State
compiled by Dixie A. Walter
Here are some of the dim-witted laws of our otherwise bright state:
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Forget about buying a TV on Sunday in Spokane. It’s illegal. Buying any kind of meat on Sunday in Washington is also against the law as is purchasing a mattress.
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This is a tricky one. A man may be looking at five years of jail time for “deflowering” a virgin. This is against the law regardless of the woman’s age or marital status. Think about it.
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It is against the law to paint polka dots on Old Glory.
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All lollipops are forbidden.
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If you are driving a motorized vehicle toward a town or city and have “criminal intentions” it is “mandatory” that you stop before entering the city limits and telephone the chief of police.
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It’s illegal to pretend that your parents are wealthy.
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One of my favorites is so nonsensical I would like to know the inner workings of the minds that came up with this. When two trains come to a crossing, neither can go until the other has passed.
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In Bremerton you can’t “shuck” peanuts on the street.
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If you live in Everett don’t plan to put a hypnotized person, or even a supposedly hypnotized person, in a store window.
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In Lynden you cannot dance and drink in the same establishment.
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In Seattle you can get in trouble with the law if you carry a concealed weapon over six feet long.
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And when riding a bus, women cannot sit on men’s laps without a pillow between them.
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No one can set fire to another person’s property without asking permission.
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You are breaking the law in this state if you drive while asleep.
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It is illegal to gather and “consume” road kill.
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At night a man with a lantern must go about 100 yards ahead of a “motor car.”
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A law in Vancouver requires all “motor vehicles” to carry an anchor to be used as the emergency brake.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So who is the judge of equines in Wilbur where it’s against the law to ride an “ugly” horse?
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Think these laws are odd, ludicrous and outdated? Ordinance Number 7, passed June 7, 1995 in San Juan County states that eight women may not reside in the same house because doing so would “constitute a brothel.” It must not be a college county.
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